This is post is odd because I am so used to revealing my deepest heart in the form of poetry only understood by those who can relate. I come to you tonight with my heart wide-open to all that is contained within.

Not to quote a country song, but "Life, Love and the Lack of" has been consuming my heart and strangling my soul with great strength. I realized that I am a useless human. I am useless because I am sinful and because Karma is much at work. However, I am not ONLY human, I am also a child of God and because of that, I am useful to the One who counts. Any effort I ever put in to my life, and anytime I try to further myself in this labyrinth of life, I fail miserably, the world won't let me accomplish anything. The world looks for me to fail and IT has the homefield advantage. I get flag after foul after fumble called on me constantly and I can never score. Then I realize the reason I am here and it's not to make my own decisions but to rely on Christ to show me the answer to the obstacle at hand.

As most of you know, I went to London for a month and spent 30 days with some of the most amazing people I have ever had the pleasure of ministering with. I had no idea what to expect and it's a good thing because God showed me and taught me more than I could ever imagine. These students have a life that none of us can fully understand. Most people write off England as a country in need because it's so rich and civilized just like the United States. It's so different. There's one reason I fell in love with London. There is an open hole that cannot be overlooked in the eyes of Christ. There is a lack of love and community that breaks my heart. The people in London only see bodies around them. When I walk through that city, I see 12 millions hearts that are bleeding because they are so hard. They are losing love and purpose and they don't even realize it. I love being there because there is a love there, that if released, would revolutionize the country completely. Regeneration is possible with love. There is no speech, no slideshow, no movie, and no emotion that could deliver the accurate level of pure unhindered PASSION that I have for this place and the people there. The 10 hour flight feels like DAYS because I can't wait to get there and on my flight home, I can only try to think about when God will bring me back to the place where my work is commissioned, where I can spend my days delivering His message and love so that one day I may see all of London in Heaven singing "My God, How Great thou ART" and that one day Christ may look upon my tear covered face and say "Well done, Shane, my faithful servant". How majestic will the face of God be as I approach the throne to see Him in all of his sovereignty!

To Chris, Angie, Matt, Armond, Kristy, Channing, Emily, Sarah, & Tim,

Thank you so much for your love and your passion for these people and for their country. It is so encouraging to see my brothers and sisters in Christ working hand in hand and side by side to fulfill the calling that we have as Christians to spread a love, hope, message, and wisdom that is far beyond any worldly scholar. I truly enjoyed getting to know each and every one of you. My return is inevitable and my work is not done. It is my true hearts desire to continue my endeavors in London and to never give up on the lack of hope in that city. I pray for your ministry and I pray that God protect your family and enable you to do His work so that all may taste His sweet love.

To Doran, Marfa, Lois, & Justin,

You are the youth of London. You are a vital part of the future of your city, your country, and the areas surrounding you. God has an outstretched hand that He holds open to you as a never-closing invitation to fall into His arms, and to surrender your soul to His will, love, mercy, and grace. The people around you have a love so strong, and a bond so tight with Christ that no evil can destroy it. You have such a great opportunity, if you're willing to see it, to reach out to those whom you call your classmates and show them what the Love of Christ looks like. You have to let Christ in to enable you to do His work. I sincerely Love each one of you and I pray nothing but love and blessings on every aspect of your lives. Christ's will for your life is perfect and righteous and flawless and it has the power to prevail any obstacle that stands in it's way. I urge you to call out to God, and pray that He uses you in every way possible and that He abounds a love in your heart so great that you can't do anything else but share it with everyone around you. God Bless You.

To Iona,

I hope you don't feel as though I am singling you out, but your situation is unique. God is preparing you for a great work, a marvelous impact, and a widespread regeneration of Love throughout London. As an independent musician, you live a much different lifestyle daily. your heart is huge and your faith in Christ is even larger. There is much to be said about a person who loves people enough that she will not rely on money and wealth to make a difference, but that she relies solely on Love and the power that is instilled in that by Christ. I have enjoyed getting to know you and I hope to continue a long-lasting friendship with you and a further supporting role in the Music Community. I pray that God holds you in His hand and guides your heart where love does no reside so that you may plant it and help it grow.

TO ALL WHO HAVE READ THIS POST,

WHAT DIFFERENCE HAS BEEN MADE BECAUSE OF YOUR OUSTANDING LOVE FOR CHRIST AND FAITH IN HIS RELENTLESS WILL AND MERCY?

I pray this encourages you all to follow Christ whole-heartedly and without a 2nd thought because you have not experienced true life and love until you have surrendered your life to God.

Love abounds for me
Virtues expressed to preserve my tender soul
Nothing chases me now
I am in a chariot
In a field of lonely sheep

Looking at the stars,
I prepare my wings for the journey
All is calm and wind is heedful of my goal
I am in a plane
On an island of flightless birds

Obstacles before me
I see a way out of hell
Fire is high, but water is abundant
I am a scholar
In an introductory course

Chased by the bull
I have nothing to fear
He is slow, for speed has been my strength
I am a runner
In a disabled city

Everything is calm
No wind, storm or cold
My chariot has no wheel, my wings no lift, my knowledge turns vain, my legs fall to danger
I am a victim
In a crowd of the neglected

For my tools are not my own
Pride and greed prevailed
Evil desires absorb all hope for light
I am a voice
In a sea of helpless faces

Love abounds for me
My wings soar far and wide
Smoky rubble behind, and the bull forever detained
I am a child
In a family of Love

So I have to pause from my lately stream of poetry to talk about a real issue.

I notice that today people have turned further and further from love. Not only from a spiritual love but constantly from a moral love. Everything is relative these days. "luv ya!" "I love you" "Much Love" "love ya" We all hear and say these things on a daily basis. Do you mean it?

What does it mean to say "I Love You"? Is it unconditional? true? sincere? endless? passionate? sympathetic? giving? yearning? pulsing? everflowing? bold? relentless?

The most powerful word universally has been the object of subjectivity way to much. "Amore, Amakukodani, Armastama, Amor, Liebe, Liefde, Ahava, Sarane, LOVE" It's all the same!

God clearly defines this as the greatest of all virtues. "Among these are faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is Love".

Whenever I think of the place I am today, the family I have, the girlfriend by my side, the job I have, the degree I am working towards, life, friends, and passions, I can't help but think that I am so blessed beyond what I deserve. I deserve punishment, judgement, ridicule, exile, and humiliation, yet I have the greatest passion and sacrifice that has paid for anything and everything sinful that I ever have done or ever will do. Blood has sunk into the ruined ground of that infamous hill where my father was murdered. Tears have rotted away the wood that once held my dad high above a city of sin. My life is fulfilled with hope, faith, and passion because my father, friend, and savior had a passion for a people that would one day proclaim who He among that world. I know His passion, care, and provisions are unconditional, true, sincere, endless, passionate, sympathetic, giving, yearning, pulsing, everflowing, bold, relentless, and testimonial!

That's Amore'!

One stroke of blue
The sky blooms out in a full array of color
Beauty I see
His brush runs through the oil
The sea, it rages and the ship's in struggle
My tragedy

The hand which paints the sun
Is same that controls the storm
He's my father, my friend, and my master
When I'm on the ship
Tossed about and waiting for the storm to calm
Painted is my Beautiful Disaster.

The line holds a wall
Boundaries unseen before
Willows can only weep
Lame men can no more walk

The color holds an essence
Expressions on her face
Sadness is a virtue
Smiles tear the veil

The scene knows a reason
Time and space combined
Apothecaries close
Denver heats the winter's wrath

The movement plans our journey
A destiny unhindered by circumstance
The road has no stripes
A speed is absent to reality

The value reads your heart
Your passions within exposed
Darkness is your turn
Your life is saturated by empty desire

The painter is a stalker
Your life is an open book
No one knows you better
Canvas has been your page

The day fades, All is still
No flight calls, still I lay awake
The ice breaks, the leaves rustle
Within me cries a pulsing absence

The flocks migrate from here
Their stay is not long
To my heart it is known
This is not my home

A goal is ideal
The blacktop loses purpose
It's used for pity rubbish
I throw mine away

For now anew rises a new place
like none other seen
A color, A line, A reflection
Light to all that is Dark

It is seen now, the end
Answers are known like air in my breath
The day knows my name
Now the night fades just so

"London is a world class metropolis of over 12 million people!" Does anything about that sound vitally important to you??? There is one word that makes this statement crucial to the expansion of the Kingdom of God. "PEOPLE". In the dictionary there are several definitions but the most specific and true definition is-"n. Humans beings, as distinguished from animals or other beings." That's 12 million people. NOT 12 million robots, or 12 million computers, or 12 million, customers, or 12 million clients, or 12 million ghosts. It's 12 million people who pass each other 365 days of the year with a faceless entity. It's over 150 nationalities and over 100 languages spoken within a 25 mile area. A person living in Greater Central London doesn't see or realize that they are passing tens of thousands of people each day. They only see their life and days destinations. There is no sense of acknowledgement that anyone else is there except for the overcrowded space on the underground!

It reminds me a of an American Christian heart. Most headstrong Christians would say, "I read my bible daily, I study God's teachings, I know He loves me. I go to church on Sunday, Wednesday, and everyother time the door is open." That's fine. You should go to church, spend regular time studying His word, and you should also spend regular time seeking his guidance in prayer. Though, there is one thing that you never hear out of that person's mouth. You never hear of how they used their passion for Christ to instill a passion in others for that day. You never hear that person say, I have been thinking of ways to help others come to know Christ because my heart burns for their future.

I attended an Hindu temple in the area. As I sat to the side and observed the traditions and rituals of that religion and tried to get an understanding of what they actually placed their faith in, my heart was broken. I watched a boy probably around 5 years of age walk down the center aisle to the main idol in the room. He placed an offering in the bin and bowed to an inanimate object with his head touching the floor. It was a book. The faith and passion that these people have for a non-existent god is unfathomable. The fact that they raise their children in this religion so intently that at the age of 5 they proceed in their own personal worship. I cried last night when I thought of how undedicated I have been. I cried for the little boy who is just starting on this journey of life.

We as a planet have a problem far beyond any financial or economic crisis. We are facing a problem of misconception. Misconception that this planet belongs to us, that we are in charge and make the rules, that we are in power to enter war and make what peace we see necessary and worthy. We claim what is not ours. We ignore and disregard lives that we pass everyday that are more than worth acknowledging.

We have a calling to seek each face with a passion for that person's eternal home. There is a desire we each should have for all of those around us and what their hearts are seeking. We should be investing in each life we encounter for the greater days that are ahead in a place called Heaven. People constantly claim that God has "called them somewhere or that it is God's will for this to happen." If you truly believe God has called you somewhere or that He has divinely set something in to place, then you should have the desire and passion to make a difference and shine a holy light on whatever and wherever that is.

Who among us can honestly say we are happy with a faceless heart? Each heart has a face, each face has a soul, and each soul has a final destination. How lonely is the 12:30 am subway that only contains a few people?

Show the face of your heart! Let your heart ache for the lost. Let your light blind those enveloped in the darkness. Let no place be unchanged after the presence of God has entered in because of your obedience.

12 million is only a piece of the 7 BILLION that reside beyond that one city!